Being brave...

...yesterday was one of those days where I just questioned myself....what are we doing? are we on the right path? have we totally gone insane? is this actually going to work? what if it doesn't? 

i *might* have had a little meltdown and pity party...but I was put right back on track...by Justin. It really helps (ridiculously so!) to have a great partner in this crazy life. 

I've been worried...what if it doesn't work out next year? what if all the schools Justin applies to will want years and years of experience? what if they aren't hiring at all next year!? I mean our window is quite small for international schools....only in Switzerland and only in the German speaking parts. Justin signed up with an "agency" of sorts that specializes in recruiting teachers for international schools all over the world. He was going to attend an international schools job fair in January of next year (through them)....but even the contact said that he shouldn't bother with the Toronto job fair (not many European schools attend), that if he could, he should attend the London job fair (impossible for us). BUT! Justin still gets access to a really good database for finding teaching positions and other help from them....which is good. Our next step is to officially compile a list of all the international schools in Switzerland with address, contact info., teaching techniques/philosophy (to personalize the cover letter) etc on each school. That way, come the new year, when it is time to start sending out his resume, we have everything ready to go and can just check off the list the schools that have received his resume. We also want to put them in order of most desired schools first (taking in account area, schools/daycare for Felix, general living must haves etc)....in case he gets more than one offer for a teaching position. 

We have been planning and researching this move for over a year now. We are planners and "waiters" (waiting around until the thing we planned for finally happens...waiting in suspension as I like to call it). We have to constantly remind ourselves to simply live. Live in the now. It is hard....so hard, but I am trying. I am just sooooo ready to be where we want to be and start to finally settle down and make roots. I want our own living space again....I want our special things around us....I want to not be planning big moves anymore! I want this dream to be THE dream finally. 

We thought moving from BC to New Brunswick was THE dream. Our big wish was to run our own hobby farm one day. It took a lot of courage for us to admit that the dream we had been working towards for a long time and talking about since we got together, was not us anymore, maybe it never was. Justin said we were brave for being true to us, to ourselves. We are brave not to settle. We are brave for going after a different path...a different dream. I am so ready for it. In the mean time though, I am going to take it all in. Day by day, we will get closer, but until the big reveal....I am going to enjoy the in between. 

Fingers crossed to see you again in 2014!